All posts in my day.

  • Digitizing some narratives in my head, as they say

    I was listening to a podcast today(actually a podcast introducing another podcast) and the narrator (who I adore, but who, much to my disappointment, my friends don’t like as well*) describes how he can take failure better than other people because he just always just adds them to his big ball of failure—that they all end up being a story to him. When something bad happens, he immediately thinks of how that is going to turn into story.

    Do…do other people not do this?

    I always think about my life as if I were a narrator. After something happens, I, too, think about how I would describe it. I usually think about how some bad event was humorous if you described it this way. In this way, generally find my life funny in a bumbling-along way.

    This is a precursor to say: I think about all the things I want to write about all the time and I know it would bring me enjoyment to share things with you, but there’s this other side of me that doesn’t actually want people to read it. I’m kind of afraid that something will happen and I’ll just end up being arbitrarily cyberbullied and is posting random content really worth that?

    It’s not. But, dear reader, here we are.

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  • PHAMETRICS // 28

    More laughter because the last time I did this was in 2015. But listen, weary audience, sometimes you need to ease into stuff.

    Me, everyday

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  • What comes next

    Before I started grad school, I wrote to myself about what I was hoping to learn and become at the end of the program and would check in every semester (or so) to reflect on how it went. Three years later, here I am again starting something new.

    Any teacher’s pet knows that the real start of the year is always in the Fall.

    Jack looking derpy throughout the years

    Jacklynn: 2013, 2015, 2018

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  • Pinapples & Turtles

    Last week I was went to the Hawaiian island of Maui. Three weeks ago, I couldn’t even list all the islands. It was a bit of a whim, but I took the time to both learn a little more about Hawaii and do some of my favorite things.

    With help from Fodor’s Maui (2016), lots of internet and youtube searches, and Unfamiliar Fishes to keep me informed, we were off.

    I’ve always been more of a mountain person than a beach person, but I feel like when you’re on the west close, you’re pretttty close to Hawaii so you might as well pop over. I’m not saying we a did a great job, I’m just saying these are the things we did:

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  • The hypochondriac

    The pair of yellow seats are a relatively new addition to the train. What I mean to say is that the yellow seat cover is new, but the seats themselves have always been there. It’s to gently remind people that these are the seats reserved for the elderly, pregnant, or those persons otherwise in special need of a seat. It’s also the seat of shame for those twenty-somethings who absently plop down there when they enter the train who might vaguely think they would get up if aforementioned persons entered the train but in actuality would not because their zoned-out on their phone. It’s a pale yellow color that, to my midwestern sensibility, makes me think “oh that will get dirty so quickly.”

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  • Oh yeah, writing

    Two weeks ago I was fortunate enough to meet up with some friends in LA for the weekend. In a moment of recovery from the southern California sun, we sat in the shade of a backyard gazebo doing the quiet catching up that is the mortar of friendships.

    What do you do to de-stress?

    My friend posed this question and we went around the circle  about what we tried. At first I said something about the meditation I do occasionally to quiet my brain before bed. When this was met with glazed eyes I remembered that what I do when I’m really stressed is write. Specifically with a pen on a paper. I’ll just pour out the nagging-mostly-negative thoughts in my head until my hand is cramped and my brain can’t think of one more bad thing to say that I haven’t already written. It’s kind of like giving my brain a good scrub. Like putting the thoughts somewhere else so I can finally feel some relief.

    With this reflection, I also realized I haven’t been writing in months and-isn’t-that-sad? I write of emails. I say more than my share of text in the group chat…but not really writing for fun. To add to this pang of guilt, I’ve been listening to The Princess Diarist by Carrie Fisher and she’s such a charming writer. She read bits from her diary at 19-years-old and it was so totally impressive. Having articular thoughts on the world? Reflections on your life that are poetic?! How does she do it all?

    I know I can’t say everything that’s on my mind, but why not say more and feel better?

    Here’s to writing about righting oneself.

  • 2017 in review

    2017 was a surprising year.

    Last year during New Years Eve I was on a rooftop in India, the election was happening, but I was hopeful. The fact that I only wrote eight (eight!!) times last year tells me that my mind was occupied elsewhere…I’ll spare everyone.

    Highlights:

    01_ I read 45 books. This was one of the things that I was most thankful for this year. Getting to listen to all the audiobooks I wanted from the San Francisco library for free through my phone was my favorite thing (you might remember it as one of my 8 posts). I want to dive further into my favorite books in another post.

    Here are a few from a sweet GoodReads screenshot. 

    02_ I went to three weddings and my entire group chat got married (sans me).

    These two!

    03_ I traveled to Wyoming, Colorado, San Diego, Boston, tourist-hoppin’ in India, France, London, Beijing, and to the tippy top of Half Dome in Yosemite on a 3-day backpacking trip.

    Andrew found a sweet chill spot.

    That sweet sweet princess time we all need.

    04_ Sunny days with sunny people

  • Holding a mirror up to nature (and maps)

    I have thought about this a lot but I didn’t know how to say it. It is clear that time is not going to make me more articulate, but maybe discussion will: We should stop caring so much about truth.

    It’s scary for me to say that considering everything that’s happening right now. I’m living in a climate where we think everything will be fixed with Truth, but we haven’t agreed on what Truth means. There are many wrongs, misunderstandings, and…well—lies—out there that we hardheadedly keep trying to shove Truth at because we think that will fix it. “How can they be so blind? How do they not see the Truth?” both sides think.

    Truth. Facts. Real. These are objective things we rational humans should agree on. Right?

    Right?!

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  • I’d be shunned by Schön right now

    One of the big differences between school and work for me is I have less time to reflect on my work. Instead of the teacher asking you ‘why’ and wanting to hear your answer, you get more of people asking ‘why’ as an opener for their idea. I’ve been working on this project lately and realizing how little mental space I give to let things settle. It’s like when you’re at a party and there aren’t enough flat surfaces to put down your cup. I was reading about a group of designers who wanted to try bring academia and practice closer together so that the research and inspirations from the academic world aren’t so far away from what people are doing at work. I thought it was a neat and a worthwhile project….and then it got lost in a bunch of email and other work.

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  • Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good

    …or good be the enemy of done.

    My co-worker would occasionally warn me “don’t let perfect be the enemy of good” when I was getting too caught up on the details of my projects. An unbelievable ~3 months have gone by since my last post. I’ve been thinking about all these big things I want to write about but couldn’t carve out the time or the ability to do so—at least with the thoughtfulness I fantasized about. It felt like, if I am going to take anyone’s time away from thinking about the political garbage fire that’s happening right now, it should be for something worthwhile. So I built up all these topics I wanted to write about in my head until they became more daunting than necessary. (But seriously, is it even ok to talk about normal things in a world so not normal?)

    Here are some things I’ve been meaning to tell you.

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