Ok, final Friday 5 post in the series. I’ve done the good parts of college, the bad parts of college, and now The Ugly.
And what’s more ugly than roommate situations? I have had 3 good roommates, 3 terrible roommates, and 2 temporary roommates that passed through my life uneventfully.
01 | Roommates that don’t clean up after themselves. And also don’t feel at all guilty when other people clean up after them. Come on!
02 | One roommate woke up in the middle of the night, in a drunken haze, and peed in the middle of the room where three other people were sleeping.
03 | Two hyper-emotional roommates. One cried all the time, the other yelled and cried all the time. Once, I was quietly working on my thesis in my room once when I heard the squealing noises. Animal or human? Inside or outside? At first I thought maybe my roommate was having an “intimate moment” with her latest boyfriend. Eventually I discerned that she was screaming-crying-yelling hysterically about her low GRE score over the phone to some poor soul. Although it was hilarious, I was also afraid for my life and tried to get out of the house as soon as possible.
04 | One roommate that was very unhygienic. Listening to a roommate talk to her boyfriend about who had stinkier feet and deciding that, No, Eric, it was her. Foot fungus? Maybe, what should she do about it? Repulsive. It was after that conversation I realized exactly what that rotten smell in our dorm room was…I remember spraying Febreeze directly into her shoe when she burst in the door (surprising me), rushed to change into the shoes I had just sprayed, and left. I wonder if she noticed. I also think she only did her laundry like 3 times during the semester and once asked me to look at cut on her foot to see if it was infected.
05 | Roommates with no social skills. FYI: Not ok to yell at people you just met. Not ok to tell people about your traumatic childhood during your first lunch together 20 minutes before class. Not ok to cheat on your boyfriend in front of your roommates who know and like him. Not ok to steal my head band and throw away things I let you borrow. Not ok to take advantage of someone’s kindness. Not ok that make the squishy face at us when you annoyed and angry. Not ok to throw your trash, including a tampon wrapper, on my side of the dorm room when you move out. Not ok to pee on someone’s rug and communal furniture and not clean it up.
Done. Let’s never speak of this again.